Wonder Woman Complex--It's Hard Work

There's this wee, little problem of mine: I. Am. Not. Jesus. "Can I get a witness?" Yea I just testified against myself. Witnesses are just for humbling me.


So why do I try to be? Perhaps it’s from childhood, “saving” a sister from an abusive father. Or times of whipping out Wonder Woman to “save” Mommy when anger erupted into an ugly monster. Where strangling fear could paralyze if allowed and many times did. Back in the days when her name was still Mommy, before maturing to the Mother stage. With maturity comes strength, etiquette, and maybe a little power, right? Never mind I was still a young 9 years when graduating to “Mother” (by choice). Did I think it’d change something?


There in my heart are a million ways to “save” people. And I don’t mean like salvation to Heaven, but hey, if I could, I’m there. No, I’m talking about “saving” loved ones who walk through hard times. Ones close to me like friends and family. Admittedly there have been those odd times I’ve even wanted to “save” strangers.


I wonder now if my problem derived from all those “Wonder Woman” shows I used to watch. The same show I won’t let my boys touch with a ten-foot, barely clad, dare-I-say, busty pole. Maybe it’s from “Electric Woman and Dyno Girl” and if you don’t know what that is, just think “Wonder Woman” wannabes.


Regardless the cause, there is a cure. It’s called—stop. Stop being something I’m not (‘cause it’s fake). Stop being strong all the time (‘cause I’m not). Stop trying to save (‘cause I can’t). Stop hiding myself (‘cause it’s not about me). Stop covering my past (‘cause it’ll never be perfect). Stop sheltering my kids (‘cause they’re His to shelter ). Just Stop. And let Him start.


I’ve got the skills for it. I do drive a car. There’s a lot of starting and stopping involved. Had license since 16, driven on the OTHER side of the road (It was normal in Japan. Really.) Even had a European license and then drove on their roads. Are you scared yet?


I start, again. Releasing my grip. Because, truth be told, my “salvation” stinks to high Heaven. It’s full of a bunch of flesh wrapped up in a little girl trying to do it in her strength. Learning His salvation is better than mine; where His love casts out fear. It’s ok to be weak . I give myself permission. He gives YOU permission. Because it’s in our weakness, His strength is perfected. Likewise, our weakness gives rest in grace and it is sufficient. For now.....


9 And He said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you, for My strength is made perfect in weakness….” 2 Corinthians 12:9



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This came at a divine time as I'd already written the above words when I read this question at "Heart to Heart with Holley". TODAY'S QUESTION: What's one little thing that helps you give God the red pen and make peace with who you are? ANSWER: Lay down His red pen of "saving" (even for wonder women) and accepting my weakness. It's ok because my weakness is where HE meets me.

Ps. My Mom eventually left this violent cycle and remarried a person who's been Dad for many years since this. As for the past, it swims in grace and forgiveness.